If you ever suspected that Hacker News is frequented by techies who have no idea how to be human, this question is all the proof you need: Ask HN: Should a man put his wife or his mother first?
However, the first comment suggests that a few humans also frequent this particular groupthink incubator:
If he wants to stay married and have a healthy marriage, a man should put his wife first.
I happen to agree with this, but I grew up in a culture where arranged marriages are not a thing.
It might be different in your culture, but in mine a man doesn’t get to choose his mother, but he does get to choose his spouse. If you believe that a man ought to stand by his choices, then it stands to reason that a man ought to put his wife first since he chose to be with her.
However, this can be taken to extremes. A man could take a “my spouse, right or wrong” stance and refuse to hear any criticism of his partner—even if his partner stood accused of child abuse, wage theft, or genocide—thus becoming complicit in his spouse’s wrongdoing.
Then again, even if your marriage was arranged I still think you should put your wife first. Putting your mother first is your father’s job.